Sunday 30 August 2015

FASTER AND FASTER

I cannot believe that I haven't posted since June. And you know what else I can't believe? It's Rosh Hashanah in two weeks. TWO WEEKS.

This is actually not possible, because wasn't it just Pesach a few months ago? And didn't I just write about RH a couple months before that? And isn't today Monday, so it's just been Shabbos, but it's nearly Shabbos again? What the hell is going on?

OK, yes, I'm busy, so that makes time go faster I guess. And yes, I am older, and the older I get, the quicker time passes because each unit of time is a smaller percentage of the time that I have already lived so it is perceived as a shorter interval. That's why, when you are young, it takes FOREVER for your birthday to come around. If you are 5, a year is a 5th of your life! That's a long time. But if you are pushing 60, like me, a year is only 1/60th of your life. So as I get older, the years will spin by faster than an Iranian centrifuge. And that's what we all have to look forward to.

There is some good to be found in this. For example, if I find myself stuck in something unpleasant or tiresome, like listening to a boring speaker or working out in gym, I just tell myself that it will all be over soon, because everything is over soon.

I have a manicure every 2 weeks, because when I became a grown up lady, some time after 45, manicures became compulsory. At first I had weekly sessions involving cleaning things up and lots of tsk-tsking from the manicurist, but as I got sucked into this desire to always have perfect nails, I eventually succumbed to the Biogel, so that needs maintenance every 2 weeks. It takes about 20-30 minutes of tidying up, infilling, painting yada yada and then about an HOUR of sitting there waiting for it to dry. (Of course, that hour passes in 15 minutes, so NP.) Only then do I go out and usually it all holds until the next session which is 2 weeks (i.e. 4 days) away.
So last session I sat and sat and then I went home and promptly got my thumb stuck in a drawer, which cause a scrape of the nail polish. Curses. One really does get obsessive about this stuff.
Daughter: 'Why not go back and have her fix it?'
Me: 'Because I do NOT want to be THAT sort of person.'
Daughter: 'I hear you.'
Me: 'And besides, it's almost time for the next manicure.'
Daughter: <silence> (But kind of judgmental silence.)

So I have got a bit of a leg-up on Rosh HaShana, because I have made a lot of chicken soup and even several containers of tzimmes, AND a honey cake, and it is all safely nestled in the freezer, along with the bulk order of meat and chicken from the butcher. So I'm feeling pretty pleased with myself about that. Except I haven't actually gotten around to inviting anyone to come for meals over Yom Tov, apart from immediate family. (But that ALWAYS happens because the butcher starts warning me about Pesach and Yom Tov at least 3 months before, which sends me into a mini-panic. I end up buying vast amounts of meat with no idea of who is actually going to eat it. And yet...it gets eaten.)

But as for the spiritual stuff, G-d help me. Every year, I feel less prepared. And before I know it, I will be sitting in my rarely-frequented seat in Shul, trying not to leaf through my machzor, counting the pages until it will be over. Because I know it will be over. It will ALL be over: Too soon.

Ksivah veChasimah Tovah, wishing for a year of good health, joy and peace. And living in the moment. (Unless the moment is unpleasant, in which case I will eat chocolate.)


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